19 Things I Learned About Love (Eros Edition)

5/30/2019



Disclosure: If you already have a happy ending, I know this isn’t really accurate for you. Please accept my apologies.

01. I miss you has no value to me. I used to crave it when I was younger. In my pre-teens, teenage years, and early twenties. But now that I’m in my mid-twenties, all that an ‘I miss you’ says to me is that you were okay with losing me and by the time you realized that you’ve lost something important, it’s already too late. 


02. Boys are very good at falling in love but not with staying in love. And this is why I think girls are very cautious of the whole flirting territory thing. Personally, for me, I think it’s fine that other people find my partner attractive as well. Just don’t put me last. 


03. Boys are very good with feeling deep regrets. I’ve read in r/askmen that a lot of the people that contribute there talk a lot about losing a good girl, and still think about this girl 3-5 years later instead of moving on at the typical 2 months time frame. 


04. A lot of love happens in a one-sided manner. Like when it comes to attempting to cut off attachments that have already formed, boys seem to want to be able to move on first and then change their mind again the next day, and ask you to keep the connection. 

But when a girl asks someone to stay, the answer is always no. Actually not just a no, it’s a fuck no. 


05. Boys may hold the moving on in no time card, but girls have the disappearing card which I feel like is more powerful than pretending to move on. 


06. People’s heart are irreversible. If they have decided to unlove you, there isn’t anything you can ever do to convince them to not come to that decision. In the same way that if someone has hurt you, you can’t truly undo the damage that’s been done to your heart. No matter what parallel universe you jump to. Nothing can undo that moment where they have decided to hurt you with knowledge and intent. 


07. I love you doesn’t count after the relationship is over. Like what the fuck does that do for me? 


08. Encounters, whether they had a sad or mutual ending, have only one purpose: To learn more about yourself and your place in the universe. 


09. Lost happiness, returns in small increments. Think of getting small packages every day just waiting to be added to your new giant collection of happiness. So don’t be too down c: 


010. A lot of people consider love as not love anymore, once newness is taken out of the equation. 


011. “I’m never going to hurt you” | “I’m not like your man” | “I don’t want to add to the people who’ve hurt you before”

It’s a trap c: Just stay away from these people.

A real person who cares about you would know there is a risk of hurting someone when they are together.
And they would always be open with communicating with you if there is a misunderstanding or if there’s anything that’s upset you or has upset them. 


012. I used to believe in the red string of fate. I know it’s embarrassing. But it’s one of those love myths that I used to help me not feel too sad about losing someone. And I especially hate it when you ask for advice and everyone’s answer is to forget about them forever. It’s like the final axe to the rejection you were dealt with. So I feel like this was a little bit of hope that I held on to and it calmed down any sadness that I felt when I was young. 


013. There is no breakup fairy tale. They always show you. Even if you demand them to tell you, they never honor that simple request. There can never be this situation where you’re both adults ready to talk about difficult conversations. And it’s always fucking delayed. 


014. Once you’ve seen someone how they treat you, don’t go back to them. Infinite chances are great, but you know. You’ve already seen how little they care about you. If they can’t drive to you for a couple of hours and you fly to them for four hours. It says a lot. 


015. The “better” person I think is a myth. For girls, anyway lol. 

For guys, I think they can find so many other girls willing to offer so many things to them. That makes each girl almost indistinguishable. Even if they have better compliments, better-dyed hair, better boobs, better anything. You’ll always get rejected equally. 
I think girls, on the other hand, have a bit of tougher luck. Like they keep finding the same ex in a different body. 


016. I still don’t understand the whole I can’t “unfollow” you business. Like you were already contributing to me disappearing and being slowly erased from your life, why can’t you hit that unfollow button and let me go? 

And the answer is always lame: “You were important to me at one point, it’s too sad to erase that :\ “

The fucking irony is iconic. 


017. Try orbiting if you can’t move on. It’s the opposite of ghosting. Where you linger around near their space. And I don’t have to explain the whole gravitational pull analogy. Eventually, you’ll get tired of checking up on them. So want them until you don’t want them anymore. 


018. Boys have a sixth sense once you’ve moved on, and they come back to destroy all the progress you’ve made. Not gonna tell you what to do. Desires outweigh everything. So choose carefully. 


019. Nothing is wrong with the Disney villains that chased after beauty instead of a man! I hate how single women are always fucking demonized as a witch or an ugly spinster because they do not want to deal with a man’s bullshit. Lmfao. 

Outro: What do you guys think of how love has shaped you? Let me know in the comments below!

Mari xx 




19 Things I Learned About Love


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