Table of Contents: Hey sharks. I should've posted this in October. But I was so busy turning trials into praise. Anyway, here we are. Together again.
I. Crowning moment.
II. Hermes in a Trench Coat
III. Vader Swagger
IV. Butchers
VI. Tramp
VII. Spiraling in San Antonio
I met the iconic Ian McDiarmid! I gave him the biggest Padawan puppy eyes 🥺 ever. Like telepathically communicating with him, "You're my icon. I can't believe you're real." I didn't want to invade his space like the fans that came before me. So, I sort of approached him like a deer that I didn't want to frighten away. But he closed the gap and held my shoulder! It's because I was hesitating and hovering my hand on his back. I felt so cool! Like I was Darth Vader in that moment. Oh, but before all of that, I think I startled Ian because my Popflex Pilates outfit because I forget that lilac or mauve blends so well with my olive-undertone skin that it looked like I was wearing nothing under my open Vader Sith jersey lol. I scandalized Palpatine lol! Anyway, we looked so good together - like master and apprentice. Like we just got back from vacation together similarly to when Vader and Palps went on vacation from that Lego movie. I was gonna ask Ian if it was okay to bring my Funko Pop of him and to bring him in the picture, but I was so nervous during the line when I was shedding my trench coat 🧥 that I forgot to bring him in the studio! Well, the volunteers were extra hardcore this year, so I was a little intimidated. So when the photographer said, “Next!” I bolted so fast because I didn’t want them to call security. But I paused mid-escape because those little curtain things they hang as dividers were kind of confusing and I had to look for the exit before I proceeded to go back and get my stuff. I think Palpatine was amused. It looked like he wanted to keep wanting to hang out. Awww, we’re brain twins that’s why. He seemed to be in a better mood afterwards. Because I felt so bad that the two other fans that came before me kept lingering and made him uncomfortable. Like his back was literally against the wall trying to avoid more contact from those hungry fans. Well, at least we had a clean interaction and it was so nice :) I enjoyed it too no matter how short it was.
Ooo, but can we talk about my outfit? It’s giving Pilates with Palpatine. It’s giving “Hey, hey, I just finished robbing the Louvre and now it’s on to Space Con.”
Well, this is my first light brush against a celebrity because last year, it was pretty intense with Richard. Like when we were at the studio, and Richard started caressing my upper arm, complimenting me and telling me, I’m beautiful, but the whole time, I was just so focused on looking at my mom’s happy face that I got to let her meet her favorite actor! It was my crowning moment! My bragging right as the eldest daughter that I am my mom’s favorite child. My siblings would weep tears of blood because they can take her to a winter cabin in upstate New York, but they can never say they took her to see her favorite actor! So the whole time it was like that moment where Mr. Selfridge was staring at his wife enjoying the ballerina that his first wife adored. And then Richard just had to snap me out of my daydream 🙄 when he anchored his hand to my left elbow and I felt a literal jolt as he pressed me against his chest on his left side. But I remembered my manners and said thank you for his compliment. And I’m so glad the camera crew didn’t get mad at me for not being more focused.
Well when I invited my mom to Space Con again this year, she said “Well, I did like your gift, but all I did was wait in a long line and eat popcorn. It was kind of boring for me.” Hah, that’s Saturn for you! So much for upstaging my siblings lol. Saturn always knows how to keep me humble lol.
There was this weird episode before I got a chance to meet Palpatine though. I went to Space Con this year, while my dad just dropped me off as he enjoyed going to an Indie Bookstore and getting Red Ribbon pastries, so I had three hours to kill before I could take the photo session with Palpatine. And this weird married ass fucker, tried to stalk me in the dining area. I didn’t even like the stupid nachos that didn’t come with any meat. Sir, your wife is right next to you. Why the fuck would you sit in front of me, when there were so many other available seats, and make her uncomfortable? That uneasy energy was unforgivable. It needed to be corrected. I pulled my inner Vader out real quick: “This interaction is over.” An executive order as Mike would put it. And I just got up and threw away my barely touched nachos into the trash can and decided to meditate near the original waiting area. Like really? Butchering your own marriage for everyone to see? That’s insane. Lesser men have more shame.
I couldn’t find a MacGyver Funko Pop in any of the booths. I kept asking every single seller and they just looked at me like I’m a wet puppy. I get it that the celebrity isn’t there, but Mickey Mouse isn’t there either, and YET you have so many Disney merch??? I couldn’t snag anything for the 40th anniversary.
My head would instantly turn every single time I would see a tall silver haired man that echoed Richard. I was swallowed alive by memories at every single turn. But I didn’t cry. I wonder how Richard tolerated this kind of absence in Paris, McAllen, Austin, Dallas, London, and Germany. And that was me spiraling in San Antonio lol.
My consolation prize: Tramp Funko Pop that made me immediately think of Richard. The grey puppy is Richard in his thirties and the Tramp is Richard is in his seventies. Saturn and sovereign.
A small Saturn love story before you go: Deucalion and Pyrrha by M.M. Bird.
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